Set up
Invite two people to face each other and agree on a short timed round per person. The point is not to explain yourself, but to say what is actually noticeable now.
Authentic Relating Games
Noticing Game
You say what you notice right now: sensations, emotions, impulses, thoughts, and what you notice about the other person. The point is to stay close to immediate experience instead of storytelling.
Game flow exampleGame flow example
Noticing Game
A simple sample of what this game can sound like in practice.
Person A
Right now I notice my chest feels tight and I am a little nervous looking at you.
Person B
Hearing that, I notice I soften a bit and I feel more here with you.
Person A
I also notice an impulse to sound smart, and I feel relief saying that out loud.
Person B
As you say that, I notice warmth in my face and curiosity about what feels relieving.
Person A
The relief is that I do not have to perform. I can just say what is happening.
A simple flow
- Begin with 20-30 seconds of silence so both people can notice breath, posture, sensation, and the room.
- Person A speaks in short present-moment statements: sensations, emotions, impulses, thoughts, and what they notice in contact.
- Person B mostly receives. After the timer or facilitator cue, switch roles rather than turning it into a conversation too early.
- Close by naming what helped you stay real and where you drifted into story, interpretation, or performance.
Prompts to use
- “Right now I notice…”
- “In contact with you, I notice…”
- “One thing I am aware of in my body is…”
What to watch for
- Long explanations instead of short observations.
- Turning observations into interpretations about the other person.
- Performing depth rather than slowing down enough to notice something real.
Good variations
- Run timed rounds where only one category is allowed, for example just bodily sensations or just relational impact.
- Add a short mirror round where the listener repeats back one line that felt especially alive before switching roles.
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Curiosity Game
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