Set up
Set a slower container and remind both people that the point is not to prove a story right or wrong, but to bring a projection into the open and reality-check it carefully.
Authentic Relating Games
What I Think You Think of Me
You name the story you are carrying about how the other person sees you, and then let reality catch up. The game makes invisible projection visible and relationally testable.
Game flow exampleGame flow example
What I Think You Think of Me
A simple sample of what this game can sound like in practice.
Person A
The story I am carrying is that you see me as too much.
Person A pauses and checks in with their body and emotions before continuing.
Person A
When I say that out loud, I notice embarrassment and also relief.
Person B
I hear both. I want to answer slowly rather than rush to reassure you.
Person B takes a breath before responding from what is actually true for them.
Person B
What feels true for me is that I feel a lot of energy from you, and sometimes I lose track of my own pace.
Person A
That lands more gently than the story I was carrying. I can feel my shoulders drop.
A simple flow
- Person A names one sentence they imagine Person B believes about them.
- Before anyone corrects it, Person A pauses and names what it feels like to say that projection out loud.
- Person B reflects what they heard, then responds from what is actually true for them without punishing, debating, or rescuing.
- Both people name what changed after the projection was spoken and reality-checked.
Prompts to use
- “The story I am carrying is that you see me as…”
- “When I say that, I notice…”
- “What is actually true for you as you hear this?”
What to watch for
- Debating facts too early instead of first letting the emotional charge land.
- Using the game to accuse rather than reveal vulnerability.
- Fishing for reassurance instead of staying with the truth that actually comes.
Good variations
- Let each person say only one projection and then switch, to keep the round contained.
- After the truth-check, invite each person to name one fresh piece of contact they feel now instead of reopening the whole story.
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Curiosity Game
Beginner-friendly bridge
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Projection Check
Reality check
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